Monday, January 15, 2018

Just checking in...

I developed film last night, and it was wonderful.  (I seem to forget how good this is for my soul. And it's become clear to me that I care far more about the process than the end results. In fact, when I really give myself over to the process, the end results are SO much better!)

What are you doing to survive the harsh winter / politics / gender wars of 2018?

Do you ever feel like your life is oddly unfamiliar to you?

Wednesday, December 27, 2017

Edmund Teske!!!

These "discoveries" make me so happy and excited. Excited, really, because it motivates me to get back into the darkroom. How is it that this photographer isn't one of the big names mentioned in every Photo 101 class? 

Anyway, check out the "duotone solarizations" and the "abstractions" galleries. AMAZING.

Sunday, November 12, 2017

Random assortment...

Polaroid 250
 The Argentina Trail, Ruidoso, New Mexico

 Instax Wide
Alomogordo, New Mexico

 Her favorite Halloween costume of all time. 
(In the official version, she wore a suite and tie and carried a briefcase...while wearing a unicorn head...of course.)

Polaroid Land 250
Ft. Richardson State Park, Jacksboro, TX
November 2016

McKinney, TX 2017

Thursday, November 2, 2017

People and Events :: Strangers that I could probably befriend, easily.

(Polaroid Land 250, Fuji 100FP)
She had just gotten off work and was waiting for her ride. She looked a little tired and blue. I asked her for a photo, and she was doubtful. I told her that I liked her look. She cheered up and said I made her day, just as her El Camino pulled up.
(I think we could be friends.)

Instax Wide.
No, I don't think I could easily befriend these two. I was actually scared of them.

Polaroid 250, Fuji 100FP
Oktoberfest 2017. I could EASILY hang with them...for about 4 hours.

This year has been a steady bobbing...going up for a gasp of air, then sinking down through the layers of warm and cold...back up to the top for air. It's the in between place. No longer really young, not yet old. Frustrated that the lessons learned don't seem to provide that soothing wisdom I hoped they would. Those hard-earned experiences are always there, yet I seem short of the calm and clarity to help me through the shit. I'm an in-between Christian, too. Not fully...anything. I've forgotten my Bible lessons, and I can hardly relate to the women around me who are neck-deep in church and "fellowship". (that sentence sounds hateful, but it's not meant to be. it's because i just can't relate...) There's something there that I can't articulate, something beyond words, that terrifies me and makes me lonelier than being alone. I honestly can't explain it. All I know is that the people who touch my heart in the most direct, no-bullshit way are the ones who are unafraid to share their good and their bad. They no longer hide the dark parts of themselves from me, and for that I am grateful. It has saved me more than once. Because who can relate to a half-person? Who can survive that kind of loneliness?
So I pray...for deep, meaningful friendships during this ridiculous time of busy-ness. I do believe that God lives in those heart to heart friendships. He works there. May my eyes be open and my heart be willing.

I just need to share something.

Downtown McKinney, 9/17
Polaroid Land Camera 250 with Fuji 100FP

Instax Wide with color film

Ft. Richardson State Park, November 2016, Instax Wide with color film

Instax Wide, color film 2016

Lake Murray State Park, Oklahoma, March 2016
 Polaroid Land Camera 250, Fuji 100FP